Thursday, January 5, 2012

Thank you to my adoring fans

My Fool has insisted that I write a sentence or two, thanking the many people who have given me gifts. Now, I don't see any need for this at all, myself. People who give me expensive gifts are justly rewarded by the act of giving, Are we not told that to give a gift is a greater pleasure than to receive one? (The correct answer is Yes, in case you were unsure).

So really these people ought to be thanking me, not vice versa. Still, the world is a topsy turvy place and we must do our best to remain upright.

First and foremost, the nasty piper man, Beorbrand, has given me a string of very nice swords, culminating in the latest one which looks more like a club it must be said. It's a very ugly sword, this latest, but hey, we all know he has no taste and is a low person of vulgar manners.

Anyway, he only made the swords because I threatened to tell Harper about the goats.

The lovely lady Wrenaya has made me a lovely songbook, with one special song decked out in gold leaf and illuminations. I'm still using it with enormous pride. She also sent me a wonderful top hat, with a pink ribbon, which makes me look even more handsome than I usually do, which is an impressive achievement if you think about it.

Harperella (may she rule forever and never require me to work hard for the Lonely Mountain Band because I would only make a mess of it and I am much better suited to standing on the sidelines looking good and anyway, my Fool says that if I ever take on actual working positions that require, well, you know, work and stuff, then he'll put me to sleep in the fountain and never wake me up again) made me some lovely expensive bling. So did Jocularity, if it comes to that, but he's only a dorf, so that doesn't really count.

Byrdie made me some lovely pants and such for a Yuletide present. I'm still wearing them, although they have gone through at least one wash cycle after the embarrassing episode with the trolls just outside Isengard which wasn't my fault at all, and anyway, a loosening of the bowels in periods of extreme fright is a perfectly natural physiological reaction of which nobody should be ashamed.

I should probably thank many other people for doing stuff, because my many adoring fans are always giving me things, but I can't remember any other names right now, so my Fool can just go boil his head.

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